Thursday, April 13, 2006

Don't have time for the Dissertation? Buy it!

As many of you know, Gmail gives you a sidebar of ads chosen based on key words in your emails. So after a few messages about my dissertation and the writing process, I'm getting dissertation-related ads. This would include some places for discount thesis binding, software and bibliography services, and a very entertaining link to a paper-writing service.

I had to check it out.

I will not link to them or mention their name, but this is a site that offers to write papers to order for you, anything from a high school term paper to a Ph.D. dissertation. Now, I've seen term paper writing sites before (and I've busted students who have hired them), but I must admit I've never seen one that offered MA theses and Ph.D. dissertations. How would that even work? Is your committee full of idiots?

The best (read: most ironic) part of the site was their warning on plagiarism. Aside from the obvious (buying your paper is plagiarism) they GUARANTEE that their work is not sold more than once, and therefore will not show up on plagiarism-tracking services that schools subscribe to these days. As one of their writers says, If research is conducted thoroughly and a good understanding of the subject is achieved, there should be no need for plagiarism.

They also include a disclaimer which basically refutes everything they've said elsewhere on the site: Our papers are produced for research purposes only; they are not to be submitted as your own work under any conditions. (I'm sure that's what your client base has in mind.) Plagiarists – are they pressed for time, or couldn’t they care less, or what? Ethics and morals need a place always, and whatever. (Whatever.)

Then there are the testimonials:

The paper looks well written
It looks well written? You couldn't even be bothered to read it after you'd paid for it?

Thank you very good essay. I am very hapy with you people. Before i tryed lots websites but your service is the best.
What can I say?

And of course, the company is hiring. The site advertises for new writers with the following material:

If you're an academic that wants to be part of the best there is and would relish the chance to help others succeed, then we want to hear from you. If your successful in your application you'll have the oppurtunity to receive a high yield flexible income whislt further refining your academic skills in the areas of your choice.

"Your?" "whislt?" I felt a strange compulsion to correct the grammar and spelling on their site. Perhaps print it out, mark it through with a red pen, and inform them that I would hesitate to give them a B on their work, despite their claims that all papers were B quality or better.

And from such a company, you can get a 200 page graduate thesis for the bargain basement price of $3990. Where do I sign up?



Eek! Don't want to be a plagiarist. I should note that all quotes in green are from www(dot)masterpapers(dot)com.

40 Comments:

Blogger Neel Mehta said...

Gosh, you're harsh. These freelance dissertation writers need to make a living somehow. What's interesting is trying to figure out who would want to work there...

1. Former academics guilty of plagiarism.

2. Teachers fired for having sex with their students.

3. Legit professors working undercover with Department of Education investigators. (The special dictum unit?)

12:47 AM  
Blogger Andy said...

Wow, I have so missed my calling. Anyone need a dissertation on historical misunderstandings of Wagner's Parsifal? Anyone? Hello? Oh.

6:48 PM  
Blogger Courtney said...

Andy, you're giving it away for free on your site. I need to develop a network in the music school to see if anybody else has been turning in your work as their own.

8:16 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Are there any legitimate academic writing services available? I am a 2yr old ABD.

1:54 PM  
Blogger Courtney said...

Well, I suggest writing your own damn papers, and not paying somebody else to help you cheat. But then, that's just me. What do I know?

6:39 PM  
Blogger esquiva07 said...

People who buy their essays from these sites are making sure they fail their courses. If someone doesn't keep up with their OWN work then when it comes to the exam they'll fail, and if there's no exam then they'll fail later in life when they go to get a related job and know nothing of their subject. Besides cheats always get found out somewhere along the line.
I'm concerned that academia research has so many medical papers up for sale...lets hope these cheats don't go into the operating theatre!!! As for the spelling mistakes...Yep its a sad world where having a face like victoria Beckham and spraying yourself orange is a more valid use of time than getting an education. In my opinion universities let in morons incapable of independent thought.

11:49 AM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Guys I got a good quality paper from Academichelp guys... Contact john.academichelp@gmail.com

They do not even charge full payment upfront...

All the best for your studies...

Cheers...

2:32 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey jagrit! tnx mate. These guys did a good job with 2 of my papers. Got an A on both.

cheers.

5:06 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

blogs are informative and this blogs is very informative for students those who want write Dissertation but they dont have that much time
________________________

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11:43 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Masterpapers and Essay capital are both outfits of the same group, which scams people and if you go back to them with repeated revision requests, they threaten to inform the college authorities. I had the worst experience of my life with them.

I would recommend writing your own paper, which is the best option, but if you still want to take someone's help, look for a writer and pay him only after you have got your paper.

Thanks.

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Anonymous Anonymous said...

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